My not so good day

I woke up this morning with a backache and headache and the chest pain followed suit.  Apa hal laaa dengan aku hari ni? Macam2 sakit la pulak...beralih2 lak tu.  After brewing Bill's hot chocolate, I laid on the sofa and watched TV...and I dozed off, waking up to only find that it is already noon.  Such a deep sleep, aku rasa kalau bunyi drilling or orang pecah tembok baru tersedar kot. Hilang kisah nak menonton TV.  Terlepas lagi favorite series aku. Sigh....

Lapar perut...I wanted to cook, but laziness overruled me. I ended up buying lunch.  Just as I parked my car, it rained in buckets.  Nasib baik before going out tadi I closed all windows. I ate the food I bought - nasi putih dengan lauk asam pedas ikan pari and sayur bendi goreng.  Erghh....sayur bendi separuh daripadanya dah kerasa macam kayu. Eating all alone, in front of the TV, with the sound of rain outside... PATHETIC tul aku rasa. Macam hidup sebatang kara pulak...dulu waktu belajar, lalui juga saat2 macam ni, tapi takde la rasa as lonely as this afternoon.

As I  was finishing my lunch, the rain subsided. I continued doing my thing... which I don't know what the heck I did today, actually. And it rained again, cats and dogs.  I just showered again, for the 4th time today, then went online.  All the achings came back - chest pain gone (Alhamdulillah, for once I thought it was a cardiac pain!), the migraine came, and the acute pain on my left leg bit again. I sat silently on my bed, facing the window, looking out at the heavy rain. I snapped a few photos of the rain...

View on the left side of my room's window

View of the right hand side from my room's window

Looking at the rain made my heart cries... here I am, all alone, and having my body aching all over.  What a great day huh?  At a time like this, when I feel sick, I just want to be alone...but I want my loved ones to simply ask, "are you okay?" but that didn't happen.  I just feel this pain of boredom and loneliness right there at one point in my heart.  I told myself to just let it go...I don't have to feel this way.  But sadly, I am.

I dived on my bed again, trying to Facebook but I ended up dozing off again.  Don't know what the hell is wrong with myself today....  I woke up later in the afternoon and right away headed to the gym.  I forced myself to exercise despite the aching legs.  The workout helped to ease the tension a little.  I am trying to sustain the less-stressed state of being till I reached home again.  My migraine revisited. Darn...!  Aku malas nak melayan semua ni, harap2 tertido balik sebentar lagi.  Dalam hati ni kata, "NO ONE CARES ABOUT ME!"

I just don't know what is wrong with me today! Maybe nobody cares, anyway...Oh, my dear eyes.... please get heavy on the lids and fall asleep again.  I don't want to succumb to this emotions.